There are times in relationships when neither you or your partner seem to be speaking the same language. You may be disagreeing over the simplest of things or maybe it has got more serious and any dialogue becomes aggressive and nasty. It may be that neither feels that the other understands and you have reached a point where talking or rows have no resolution and you are going around in circles.
There may be issues over:-
Children: You may have step-children and the situation has become difficult. There may be a new baby or teenagers or indeed a child with a disability and life in the family has become fraught and loaded. Understanding these issues from a different perspective with renewed consideration often eases what may seem as insurmountable problem
In-laws: The family of partners might be a reason for discord in your relationship for any number of reasons. Adjusting to a new set of values can seem daunting or just downright pointless. Thinking about and recognising the diversity of the family unit often creates the space that allows this difference to enhance and not necessarily detract from harmony.
Money: So often money can become such a contentious issue with partners and may manifest in serious and unforeseen differences in approach. Diverse family values with regard to money and financial situations can often be an issue that couples had not foreseen. Recognition of this difference, negotiation and exploration of an often delicate topic assists couples to navigate their way to resolution and accord.
Infidelity: Discovering that your partner has been unfaithful will be devastating and couples react in many different ways. Some individuals will indeed want to end the relationship immediately. However as a result of working through their anguish, endeavouring to understand why it has happened and establishing ways to restore their connection, many couples have found their relationship can become even stronger and more honest than ever; reinstating the essential trust that had been lost.
Elderly Dependants: In this age when we are living longer couples can often find themselves caring in one way or another for elderly dependents and this can sometimes put enormous strain on the relationship. Using the counselling space to acknowledge the difficulties, ascertain solutions and hear the other can often alleviate the tension this situations creates.
Sex: This can create harmony and beauty in a relationship or conversely discord and ugliness. Please see my separate section on psychosexual therapy which informs you how I may help the many problems couples face.
Entering into couple counselling can be scary. As well as sharing your deepest thoughts and worries to a compassionate therapist there will be in the room the person who will probably disagree with your views. Or indeed you may be feeling decidedly uneasy about possibly hurting your partners’ feelings about what you want to say. During a counselling session at my clinic in Hove my clients each have my equal attention and consideration and are given a safe and secure environment in which to express the issues that have brought them to therapy.
The difficulties couples face are many and whatever difficulties you may be experiencing I can offer to help unravel and unpick those relationship threads that have become tangled.